I’m an odd duck, I can admit it. I’m curious and will ask about things most people wouldn’t dream of talking about, let alone asking questions. There’s also very little that embarrasses me so my filters and boundaries are few and far between. Which means this whole rant may just be me, you let me know. Here’s my question: What is up with characters NOT experiencing real life situations?
When was the last time a character farted in a book? I haven’t read that anywhere, ever. We all know, us girls get bitchy once a month, but that whole thing is glossed over with a ‘my visitor came a calling’ and nothing more. This is a huge part of our lives, what is with ignoring it completely?! Anyone with a booger tangled in their nose hairs? Nope, haven’t read that either. A painful wedgie in the middle of a board meeting, when you are in the front of the room, and you know everyone can see it? Nadda. Oh oh, what about boring sex where you have to fake it? And along those lines, why are men always hung like donkeys and no one chokes on pubes! It’s like there is this unspoken rule that certain situations are taboo in books and to be honest, it makes me sad. Why are things skipped as if they don’t exist?
Now I’m not saying, I want all the nasty details or to be shocked. I’m saying, why can’t characters be more realistic and more human? Yes books are a way for us to forget our lives and live as someone else, somewhere else, and to do that it has to be a dramatic version of the world we know. I’m not arguing that. It’s just that, it would be nice to throw in an occasional real human factoid in a novel so things appear real. It would make the characters easier to relate to. It would also be hilarious.
Let the guy be clumsy or inadequate in bed. Let Captain Winky be a normal size. Let the chick be bored and be ticking off her to do list in her head as she’s faking her way through a 5 minute love session. Let someone laugh and blow a booger out of their nose onto someone. What can it hurt?
I just think, that real life situations, no matter if they are embarrassing or inspirational, are important to who we are as humans. The same goes for characters in a book. The more realistic with all kinds of little details, the more these people pop out of the book and take on form. The more solid of a form, the more we love the character because we can ‘see’ them. So why not put them in more realistic situations that we can relate to?
Am I alone? Would you like to see a character more realistic?
I’m with you there. I thought I was the only one who ranted about this! Everyone would tell me, who would want to know when a girl was on her period? – It’s gross. I would be like, I would! I would love to see a situation where some female character has painful cramps, is in this fantasy/sci-fi situation and has to find a way out of one problem or other. How would she deal with it, on top of everything else? Not to mention the list of really cool, real-life embarrassments that would add a lot of laugh-out-loud situations.
Preach it, sister.
I have two books for you!
The Corset Diaries – one incredibly funny and memorable farting scene.
Faking It – has a great first sex scene with the H/h and she’s pretty much just laying there waiting for him to be done.